If your briefcase isn’t within new size regulations, you may have to leave it in the car.
By Greg Rawlings

In the light of the ever-increasing size of lawyer briefcases, many of which are now so large that they won’t fit through the metal detectors, or courthouse doors, for that matter, the Colorado Supreme Court has issued Briefcase Directive No. 1, which is available as of today on the Court’s Web site.

After a heated discussion over whether to be especially severe and utilize the carry-on restrictions of Mesa Airlines as a model, or the far less draconian standards of United Airlines, the Supreme Court Briefcase Size Committee (SCBSC) opted for the Solomonic middle ground.

According to a spokeperson for the SCBSC, who chooses to remain nameless, the court deemed the size of the two-seat tables at Tommy’s Thai on East Colfax the upper limits of briefcase size—especially that table closest to the bathroom. A template is now available on the SCBSC link on the Supreme Court Web site, or you can simply go to Tommy’s with your tape measure.

Craig Eley was overheard to recommend the "cliche but excellent Phad Thai," as a post-measurement repaste. "Preferably with the Thai iced tea. Yummy."

A spokesperson for the CTLA, a spokesperson for the ABA, and an especially vocal one for the NABM (National Association of Briefcase Manufacturers), all refused comment.

A cle on the new directive is scheduled for April 1.